Subtle abuse=depressed child

The insidiousness of parental abduction and alienation, a very real form of child abuse, is in part in the subtle messages a child is given about a part of themselves. It is in the occasional comments about the mother/father who was left behind, comments that are often about how they are mentally ill/ugly/racist, and always, that they were bad parents. And in linking that person to the child, as in "Oh you're just like your mother when you nag me about such and such," "Your father had horrible manners, too," or negative comments about the religion or nationality about the left-behind parent, makes a child feel like there's a part of them that is no good, and will never be good enough because the other parent can never be entirely erased from the child.
The abductor's / alienators goal, in part, is to eradicate the left-behind parent from the child´s life. A child will always be aware that they are a part of that left-behind parent, so it is a recipe for building self-hatred in a child. In my case, in addition to these types of comments, I was taken to Holocaust survivor conventions to impress upon me how much Jews have suffered in the hands of Christians. My mother is a Christian, and I learned to fear that part of me, the Norwegian, Christian part of my ancestry, that comes from my mother. I felt scarred, like I didn't truly belong anywhere and had to prove my worth to everyone, including myself.
Ironically, none of the Holocaust survivors said anything bad about Scandinavia. In fact, many of them felt it was wrong for a young child to be in attendance at something so intense. I remember a few talking admiringly of Scandinavia's actions during WWII. But my father wanted to use the war as another way to make me fear and turn my back on the Northern European part of me, and to fear Christians in some way. I was too young to assimilate what I was seeing and hearing. The pictures and stories were too much for me, and led to further terror. I hated the "other" side of me, everything about it, and tried desperately to make it go away. I fought with other kids who insisted that I had a mother. At one point I had decided that I never had a mother, ever, as it made it easier to cope with the self-hatred. I screamed at another child who told me that everyone has a mother. "No, NOT ME!" I yelled.